Littering And....

No, not smoking the reefer. Super Troopers is a damn good movie, though.

If you've ever been to Las Vegas, I'm sure you'll agree that place is the litterbox of the US. It's probably the filthiest city I've ever been to. Even driving into Nevada, as soon as you cross over the border from UT into NV, the pavement turns to crap and you begin seeing garbage scattered about the sides of the road and tangled in the weeds in the median. How is it that people still think it's ok to toss waste out the windows of their vehicles?

The other day I was heading up I-80 to Park City. I checked my rear view mirror and noticed a kind fellow riding my ass, in his Audi Allroad. My standard reaction in this instance is to begin coasting, generally slowing down once I take my foot off the gas pedal. Usually, this frustrates the tailgater, prompting them to swerve into another lane, slam on the gas pedal (decreasing their MPGs, ooooh checkmate suckerz...) and leave me in their dust.

Now, even though I shouldn't, I give them the obligatory stare as they pass me and I'll typically just smile or wave, hoping to see them pulled over at some point on the side of the road. However, in this particular instance, while the driver was laying on the horn his ugly girlfriend decided to toss her beverage from McDoo out the window as they passed me - spraying backwash and ammo-dumping ice cubes onto the pavement at breakneck speed. Please also note that I was going 75mph in a 65mph zone; so these goodies were probably going 80mph or faster when they passed me displaying their utmost class. No, I didn't write down their plate number. No, I didn't tail gate them back. But I made sure to pick up the next piece of trash I saw later on that day and toss it out. I'm such a boyscout.

The point of this blurb is to say thanks to my Mom for instilling in me the fact that littering gets us nowhere. I remember riding home after Mom took me through the drive-thru at, ironically, McDoo's, when I was a wee sprout (probably four or five years old). I had finished my drink and went to toss the cup out the car window. Mom caught me in the middle of this terrible act I was about to commit just before I was able to release my excited hands - dropping the cup on the ground as we drove down the road. She told me I better not drop that cup or I'd be in for it when I got home. Instead, Mom let me know that I could instead throw the cup into the street from our driveway. A great compromise.

I sat patiently for the rest of the car-ride home. I was prepping myself, getting ready to throw this cup as far as I possibly could from the edge of the driveway. As soon as we pulled into the driveway and the car was stopped, I jumped out of the car, sprinted to the end of the driveway (probably 10 feet), spiked the cup on the ground like my child-hood hero, John Elway, and stomped it flat like a pancake. I proceeded to peel the cup off the pavement, grinning at my destruction, and hail-married that thing into the center of the neighborhood road.

The crushed cup sat in the middle of the road while I stared at it from the end of my parent's driveway. It wasn't transforming into something magical, it wasn't changing colors, it wasn't getting up and walking away on it's own. It just sat there. I became severely bummed. In the experience I had gained in my four or five years of life, I thought littering was the cool thing to do. Mom was smart - inadvertently teaching me a lesson without me knowing. Shortly after realizing the cut wasn't going to do any good in the street, I went a picked it up and tossed it in the garbage.

That's me; the litterbug.

Thanks, Mom.

Greenday

I was 12, in the sixth grade (1994) and didn't know much about anything (still don't). I had just gotten a stereo with CD player one year before and the first two CDs that were given to me will remain un-mentioned.

With some money from Christmas that year I went and purchased Greenday's first commercially-produced album, Dookie. A couple of my buddies in the neighborhood also got it, but their parents took it away from them once they learned how many times the F-word was used in the lyrics.

My parents didn't ever really ask or seem to concerned about any of the music I've listened to, especially when I was growing up. I guess it pays to be a good kid sometimes.

I still have the Dookie CD and pop it in every now and then; Welcome to Paradise brings me back to living in Delaware, hating life and not knowing much about anything. All great feelings to be reminded of on a given day.

Pee Chee Folders

Man - At the beginning of each school year I was perhaps most excited about getting a new fleet of Pee Chee folders. Their soft colors and generic sports illustrations were way ahead of their time, that's for sure. Another great quality of the Pee Chee is that the folder's pockets run vertically, so if you pitch the folder upside down, all your crap stays neat and organized inside and doesn't come sliding out the top of the folder.

Bro Brah Ra Cha

Shaka bra...BRO!!! Man, I'm psyched when people are psyched. Like this surfer dude.

Chaa!!! Yeaaah!!! This guy watched too many Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as a kid.

On another note, I believe I have a cyber stalker. The individual refers to themself as DINGO. DINGO, meet my readers - readers, meet DINGO. DINGO refuses to reveal his/her real identity to me, but knows a surprising amount of information dating back to when I was (or we were?) in college. DINGO frequently leaves comments on my blog - all of which I refuse to verify for posting because they're nonsense b.s. DINGO may be reached at m.burest@gmail.com (some other faux identity as I don't recognize that name, either) if you have any questions, comments or concerns regarding their obsession with bugging the sh*t out of me.

Oh yeah, how about that sufer dude? Watch that clip above again - and forget about DINGO.

Hey Subaru - You Done F#%&@D Another Car Up

My first blog post was back in October of 2007 - when Subaru gave the Impreza hatchback an unnecessary facelift. Look at that thing. Makes you wanna puke, doesn't it?

Well, as we all know (or at least those that know...know..), Subaru re-upped the Forrester and turned it into a BMW X3-wannabe. I'm not even going to post a picture because I can't stand how terrible the new Forrester looks. Look it up on your own if you really want to see one, or maybe check your neighbor's driveway. Here, this is the old-style (at it's peak):

Badass, right? Well, the new one is the exact opposite of the old style.

It doesn't end here, folks. The boys at Subaru are at it again and they've done ruined another, formerly, great looking automobile, the Subaru Outback. Like the new Forrester, I refuse to post any pictures of the 2010 Outback. It's hideous. It makes me want to crawl back into the womb. It's a terrible sign of things to come. Along with my '92 Loyale blowing up (see a few posts below), I'm officially disenchanted with Subaru as a whole and am shopping another Japanese car brand to turn my current two-wheel situation (bike) into a four-wheel situation (car). Tina, babe, I still like your Impreza....

Oh, and if you want to puke, check out the new Outback here: PUKE

About Ben

Ben and I go way back. My first memory of this guy dates back to the 6th grade in study hall. We didn't know each other at the time and I was sitting up front like a nerd. Ben was cooler than me at this point in time - he was sitting in the back - making jokes about the teacher and laughing with a buddy. I thought they were making fun of me and I tried my hardest to not let their antics bug me for those next 45 minutes. The next year Ben and I were in the same language arts class. We instantly became friends. I can easily say that a grand amount all of my memories from middle school and most of high school involve Ben. So much fun, so many jokes, so much b.s., such good friends.

Even though Ben and I live 2,500 miles away I always make a point to hang out with him when I visit back east. It always seems we pick right up where we left off the last time we saw each other. We also keep in pretty good touch through emails and the like.

Here's a pic of Ben (left) and I and another buddy of ours, Andrew (on the right) on a trip to New York City just before our junior year of high school. Damn....nearly 10 years ago.


Now, back to the main reason for this post. Ben is raising money for a 5K walk that he will be participating in which will be held in Philadelphia, PA on August 23. This is a fundraiser for the Lance Armstrong Foundation. I made a donation, and so should you. Everything helps. You may donate to Ben here.

This One Bit the Dust

My 1992 Subaru Loyale has officially bit the dust. The timing belt has gone and I'm throwing in the towel. It'll cost more for me to fix than I want to pay forward, so I've posted this link on craig's page. Pay it a visit. Laugh. Cry. Make me an offer on my non-operable car. It was great transportation, especially in the winter.